Fist Pump® Shirts

Thanks for announcing that you're a douchnozzle from Long Island before you even open your mouth and assault my ears. P.S. FUCK YOU MTV.

Hizamakura Lap Pillow

Cut off the head...

Boyfriend/Husband Pillow

Anouther satisfied customer.

8-Bit Dynamic Life Shirt

Also comes with trophy case so she can keep your testicles safely locked up while you go out in your matching outfits.

My Beating Heart

"Once on, My Beating Heart can be turned off again by squeezing the label, or it will turn itself off after 20 minutes."

Wait...WHAT happens after twenty minutes???

CarLashes

Who's the prettiest car in the garage? You are! Yes you are!

Clicker Universal Remote Bottle Opener

Dear God,

THANK YOU

with love and lollipops,
your Evil-Lyn

Sküüzi®

This is a much better idea than holding it between my toe socks.

The Flip Clock Time Talks

Because I am just that lazy.